Faded Chapter
by tangerinemochimaiden
Summary: I never wanted to be like this. I just wanted to know who loved me. I built this wall not because I'm shutting out everyone from my life, but because I wanted to know who loved me enough to climb it for me. Birthday gift for 2.three.abi RxR :3


"Faded Chapter" by: tangerinemochimaiden

Summary:

I never wanted to be like this. I just wanted to know who loved me. I built this wall not because I'm shutting out everyone from my life, but because I wanted to know who loved me enough to climb it for me.

Legend:

Normal dialogue

**Word emphasis**

_Flashbacks or thoughts_

A/N: Belated happy birthday, Abi-nee! MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~ 3 this is for you. Hope you like it!

"Auntie. How come I've never seen you with a boyfriend?" the little brunette with crimson orbs asked the raven-haired woman in her late 30s.

"Because dear, I don't want a boyfriend." She answered as she pulled the little girl into a hug.

"Don't you feel alone, Auntie Hotaru?" she asked.

"Why would I, Minami? I have you, your mother, and your father. I have the company. I'm surrounded with people I love. Hey. Aren't you a tad bit too young to know about these kinds of things?" she cocked up an eyebrow.

"Nah! Minami is a big girl now." She said as she jumped off Hotaru's lap and showed her how grown up she was.

"-chuckles- Right. You ARE big now. So I guess you can sleep in your room alone now?" she asked her.

"Y-yeah. But I want Auntie Hotaru with me!" she ran to hug Hotaru.

"Aw. That's sweet." She said as she hugged the little girl back. "I guess I have to tuck you in now." She continued as she carried the little girl in her arms. She walked upstairs and opened the door leading to the little girl's room. She opened the bedside lamp and laid the girl on her bed.

"But, Auntie. It's too early for bed!" she whined.

"But I promised your mommy I'll tuck you in by eight. Would you want eye bags under your pretty eyes?" she asked her as she lied down beside her.

"NOOOOOOOO! Well Auntie, since I'm not sleepy yet, could you please tell me a story? You didn't make a promise to mommy that you wouldn't tell me any bedtime story, did you?" she asked her, flashing her puppy-dog eyes.

"Well, no. Oh alright then. What would you like to hear about?" she asked.

"I want a story of your childhood, Auntie." She answered.

"Oh. Okay. I have the perfect story for you. But promise me you'll sleep after this." she made her promise.

"I promise, Auntie. As long as you don't keep your story TOO short." She promised.

"I first encountered love, when I was 12…" she trailed off…

_~FLASHBACK~_

_A certain twelve-year-old raven-haired girl woke up to the rays of light shining directly on her face. she rubbed her eyes, stood up, grabbed her towel and took a bath. After taking a bath, she slipped into a set of clean clothes; white long-sleeves under a polka-dotted black shirt, a purple mini-skirt, black leggings and purple sneakers. She grabbed her bag and went downstairs. She just grabbed a piece of toast and bade her mother goodbye. She ran for the door, only to be surprised that a blonde boy was waiting for her at their front porch._

"_Hey." She mumbled, quite indecipherable, the toast still in her mouth._

"_Hey. So, you ready to go?" he asked her, stretching out a hand for her to hold._

"_Why're you suddenly picking me up at home?" she asked as she linked her hand with his and walked down the porch._

"_I wanted to talk to you, and walk you to school." He said as they walked._

"_Oh. So what is it that you want to talk to me about?" she asked as she noticed an old lady smiling at her and then suddenly winking at her._

"_Well, I know this is something out of the blue, but Hotaru, I really like you." He said, nervousness evident in his tone. She was speechless, and that made his face turn from a bubbly façade to a glum look. "It's okay if you don't feel the same." he trailed off as he slowly let go of her hand. Unfortunately, that hand grabbed his and slipped her fingers in the spaces between his._

"_Who said I didn't, you old fart?" she chuckled. He suddenly hugged her in his happiness._

"_You can't imagine how happy I am!" he exclaimed as he lifted her._

"_Oh really now? I think I can." She winked, hugging him back. "We're almost in school. You seriously have to put me down. Not unless you want everyone to tease us." She said._

"_Oh, screw them. What matters is you and me." He said, still not letting go._

"_I swear if my mother finds out, then boom goes the dynamite." She said as she rolled her eyes. He finally let go. They went to their respective separate classes, and their classmates were telling them they both had goofy smiles on their faces. By the time it was already their dismissal, Ruka's class was dismissed earlier, and he waited for her outside her classroom. As soon as she was dismissed, she went out of the classroom, only to see that her best friend was waiting for her outside her classroom._

"_Well? You're fetching mme again." She pretended to complain. She just wasn't used to this kind of things._

"_I wanted to spend more time with you. Is that bad?" he asked, choosing his words to seemingly make her guilty._

"_Then go spend time with me. Where to anyway?" she asked him._

"_Our favorite hangout place." He stated. After hearing this statement, she quickly grabbed his hand and ran away with him. After running a few blocks, they stopped to catch their breath. When they finally gained back their composure, they walked inside the cupcake store. She sat down on a table for two as she waited for him to finish ordering their food. She looked outside the shop's window and thought how good it was to be with him that day. She was staring idly at the trees when she suddenly snapped out of her trance because he already came back with a tray that contained two cupcakes and two glasses of water. He sat down in front of her._

"_Red Velvet Vixen, your favorite." He said as he placed a red cupcake with an elegant crown of cream cheese in front of her. She was touched that he knew her favorite cupcake._

"_Aw, thanks. Well let me guess yours. Vanilla Sunrise with an adornment of toffee cubes, your favorite as well." She winked as she pointed at the cream-colored cupcake with a halo of blue fondant and two toffee cubes on top._

"_You're absolutely right." He said as he dipped his finger on the blue fondant and smeared it on her nose. She laughed it off and he did as well. Unbeknownst to him, she already dipped her finger on the icing of her cupcake. And so as he was laughing, she swiftly smeared icing on his cheek._

"_Ooh! You naughty girl." He teased as he wiped off the yellow cream on his face._

"_Nuh-uh! You started it." She responded with a cute pout. Her lips, oh her lips were like a rosebud. She had her arms crossed over her chest as he looked at his azure eyes. In split-second timing, he stood up from his seat and planted a soft kiss on her lips. He pulled away as soon as his lips came in full contact with hers. They both blushed all shades of red, and to divert their attention away from the recent incident, they ate away at their cupcake while avoiding each other's gazes. Finally, after finishing her own cupcake, she broke the silence._

"_Why did you do that?" she asked in a flocculent tone._

"_I-I-I don't really know. I suddenly had the urge to do so." He replied as he looked out of the window from total embarrassment._

"_Look at me when I talk." She said in a stern voice to catch his attention. He immediately turned his head to show her respect. "You're only allowed one kiss a day. Extra kisses would cost you." She said as her irises turned into yen signs. Upon hearing those words, his blank face turned into a giggly face, but it was still evident that he was worried sick about something._

"_Oh yeah. I have something for you." He said as he rummaged through his bag to reveal a velvet box. He placed it in the center of her palm. She opened it to see that there was an earring. It was beautiful; it was a silver ring with a little onyx gem on it. "Well? Do you like it?" he asked._

"_I love it!" she blurted out as she hugged him. "It's just like yours!" she exclaimed. He admired her adorable face. she suddenly noticed that the design of her water glass emitted a shadow on her finger that looked like a ring. "Look, Ruka. It's like a shadow ring." She pointed out."_

"_Yeah. It looks like a ring." He answered._

"_Bring your hand over here." She said as she pulled his hand next to hers and adjusted the water glass. "Now we botth have shadow rings. It's as if we're already an official couple." She smiled, and he smiled as well. He loved hearing her last five words. She was admiring the shadow rings when her gaze brushed over her wristwatch. It was already 4 o'clock. "Oh shoot. It's getting late! I have to go! Bye!" she kissed his cheek then darted off. As he watched her make her way out of the shop, he placed his hand on his cheek and felt the warmth of her touch. When she reached home, her mom was in the living room, neatly folding the laundry while watching her daily dose of "koreanovelas" She and her mom looked awfully alike, except her mom's hair reached her waist while she had REALLY short hair._

"_Hotaru Imai. And where exactly have you been at this hour?" her mom asked in a cold and stern voice._

"_You see mom, I was assigned to clean the classroom today. And boy was it so messy." She pretended to be exhausted._

"_Oh okay." Her mother was convinced with her excuse. "Hotaru?" she called out._

"_Yes,mom?" she responded as she walked back to her._

"_Have you heard about the Nogi-san and his mother?" she asked her daughter._

"_What about them?" she tilted her head to the side._

"_Hasn't Ruka-chan told you about moving?" she asked. "Everyone was talking about it at work." She continued. Hotaru didn't wait for her mother to finish sentence, she immediately dropped her bag on the floor and darted out of the house. After a few blocks or so, she reached the condominium where he lived. She ran up the stairs as fast as her feet could carry her. When she reached their unit, she kept on banging on their door._

"_Ruka Nogi! Get out of there! Drag yourself out here! Please." She cried as she banged her fists on the bare mahogany door. After a few more minutes, she gave up and fell on her knees. She waited for him to come, but he never did. When darkness fell, she decided to walk back home. She was crying an ocean of tears while walking home. When she reached their street, she saw a figure waiting in front of their house. She immediately wiped her tears to conceal her grief. She walked stiffly as she approached him. "What do you want?" she asked._

"_I wanted to tell you something." He shyly said._

"_What? That you're leaving? I already know. Why didn't you tell me?" anger was seen in her whole being._

"_When I was with you awhile ago, I saw how happy you were. And I wanted to have a good time with you." He explained. She let another batch of tears fall as she stifled sobs._

"_So, when are you leaving?" she asked in between muffled sobs._

"_T-tomorrow." He stuttered._

"_Tomorrow? And you're telling me this now?" she lost it._

"_The reason why I'm here is because I figured out I wouldn't have enough time to say goodbye tomorrow. I guess this is goodbye…" he trailed off as he stretched out his hand to shake it with hers. Her face showed that she was truly disappointed with him. Instead of shaking his hand, she pushed his hand away with a loud smack. She ran away from him, letting every tear fall on the cold pavement. His eyes were welling up with tears, but he didn't let them fall until he reached home. Meanwhile, when she entered the house, her mom was walking in circles, worrying where her daughter have been. She was relieved when she saw the door crack open and revealed a grief-stricken Hotaru. She just looked at her while she walked to the door of her room. But before entering the room, Hotaru ran towards her and hugged her while crying._

"_Oh, Hotaru. I'm so sorry." She apologized as she hugged her daughter back. After eating dinner, she tucked her in bed. But no matter how much she tossed and turn on her bed, she just couldn't sleep. She just sat cross-legged on her bed and stared at the earring he gave her. After a few hours, her dad came in._

"_Taru-chan…are you still awake?" he asked in the dark, and then he opened the lights, only to see his daughter's tear-stained face. "Do you want to walk with me outside?" she nodded. She dressed up then she held hands with her father as they walked in the park._

"_I wish time would stop. My heart aches, papa. It hurts." She sobbed._

"_Love is never easy, Taru-chan. You want papa to stop time?" he laughed when she nodded. He ran in circles saying that time should stop, and that made her laugh._

_The next day…_

_She ran to his condo unit to see if she could reach his unit in time just before he leaves. When she reached the building, he was outside, fixing his bag on the back of their car. He smiled when he saw her walking towards him._

"_You know what? I discovered that I would be fine without you. But you, you're going to be miserable without me." She joked._

"_I know so." He answered._

"_Hey. I wore it." She said as she parted her hair to reveal the earring on her ear. He beamed at her as he showed her that he was wearing it as well._

"_Hotaru, I promise I'd send you e-mails and pictures everyday." He promised, drawing a cross on his chest._

"_I expect you to keep your promise, Nogi." She threatened with a cute pout. He brought out his cellphone._

"_Wanna take a picture?" he asked, and she answered with a nod. He gestured her to come closer, and he placed an arm around her. They both wore enlightening smiles on their faces. _

"_Hey this picture isn't THAT bad. It's actually good, especially now that you're in it." He blushed as he said those words._

"_You should look at this picture at least 500 times a day." She teased. "But seriously, do you really have to go?" her face turned gloomy._

"_It was suddenly decided. After Mother's last breakup, she needed space, and with her promotion in tune, we really need to go." They were talking a lot, maximizing the time they have, but their conversation was broken when his mother walked out of the building, carrying the last luggage they had to load. "She may not be the perfect mother a boy like me should have, but she's still my mother, and I love her." He said quickly._

"_Hotaru-chan. Sorry to break your conversation, but we have to go. Take care! Goodbye." His mother bade. She was beautiful- scratch that- she was BEYOND beautiful. She was a goddess; with her long golden locks and slender figure. She could be mistaken as a clothing line model. She was as graceful as a swan._

"_I guess this is it. Goodbye, Hotaru. Please don't cry. I might get guilty." He said as he wiped a tear from her face with his thumb. She didn't reply anymore except when she returned his "I love you." After that, he got in the car, and he left her. She just stood there, and when the car was out of sight, she fell on her knees and cried her eyes out. The weather soon joined her as the skies cried with her._

_They kept in touch for the next several years, but their communication broke down when they graduated college. She was devastated, so she set out to look for him. As if on cue, he found him when she had her monthly checkup. He was there in the hospital, but what surprised her was that he was seeing an oncologist. She met him, and sought out the truth from his pale lips. He had cancer, and he only had 5 months to live. She asked him why he didn't tell her, but he just kept silent. She took him home, and took care of him until the last moments of his life. They got married in the first month when she moved in, and she never complained about taking care of him. He became thinner, paler and his hair fell off as the months went by. He died on the seventh of September, the day of their fifth monthsary. Their hands were intertwined while watching the sunset when his hand lost grip of hers, and in that moment, she knew that he let go not only her hand, but his life._

_End of Flashback_

"And that's why I don't have a boyfriend. I had a husband once and he died, but I still love him. And I promised myself I would never replace him in my heart. " She said as she glanced at her niece, only to see that she was snoring lightly. "I finally tell you the reason, and you sleep it off." She said with an exasperated sigh. She fixed her blanket, planted a kiss on her niece's forehead and went out of the room to watch television in the living room. She was surprised to see Mikan and Natsume home early.

"Is she asleep?" Natsume asked her.

"Affirmative. She even asked me to tell her a story before she slept." She answered.

"What did you tell her?" Mikan asked, tilting her head a bit to the side.

"A story about Ruka…" she answered.

"You know what, I really miss that stepbrother of mine." Mikan stated.

"I understand. I miss him too. And I will never forget the most significant chapter in my life." Hotaru said.

THE END.

A/N: Sorry it's too long T^T OH WELL. Did you like it? Please send me a review ;)

-tangerinemochimaiden, 8/27/2011, 7:05 pm


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